This May Be The Last Time

I just finished nursing Liam for the night. And perhaps, (sniff, sniff) I just nursed him for the last time. Maybe he was too tired. Maybe he was full from a big dinner (of baby food). Maybe he was a little confused because we weren't in our regular nursing spot. Or maybe he's ready to stop nursing. Either way he seemed to have "lost his latch." He couldn't quite figure it out and barely nursed from either side. He's always favored the left boob, but even that one couldn't keep his interest tonight. I finally asked Mike to make a bottle, but the little guy only took an ounce from there. Not sure what it was but I have very mixed emotions about that possibly being the last time I nursed. If it was the last I won't miss how nursing has been the last few weeks: his attention hard to keep, me having to send Mike and Quinn either outside or to the basement, his short sips only to stop aburptly to look around the room then latching back on again, and he hasn't fallen asleep nursing in the longest time. We've worked ourselves down to just nursing at night - the first step of his bedtime routine (story then a song follows that). When I do miss that nursing session for one reason or another, I don't pump and I hardly notice my boobs full of milk. I will try again tomorrow, I think. And if it happens to be that he's finished nursing at least this was on his terms, just like it was with Quinn.

Feb. 2, 2008 The last time he fell asleep nursing.