Totally Justified. totally.

All day yesterday I had a headache. The kind of headache that actually had me taking advil or something every four hours - on the dot. This morning Liam woke up at 4am and finally fell back asleep at 4:30. Then Quinn woke up at 5:30am and I grumbled, jesus christ, under my breath as I whipped the covers off and went to instruct him to go back to bed after he went to the bathroom. But I don't waaaaaaaant toooo. It's time to wake up. No, It's not. Back to bed. Good night. Love you. I muttered some more as I made my way back to bed only to turn off the alarm and start the day. I wake Him (mike) up to make sure he doesn't have to use the bathroom before I get in the shower - which of course He does. Why can't he just use the other one in the basement, damn it. Ugh - always making my life so hard. He finally emerges from the bathroom and goes about His morning routine which includes - getting dressed, eating something, and sitting on the couch waiting for me to get out of the shower. As if He couldn't, instead of sitting on His arse on the couch, empty the dishwasher, or prepare the bottles for the day, or put away the dishes that are in the strainer, or wipe the table down, or DO SOMETHING, ANYTHING, but no, He sits on the couch and waits. I finish my shower and He says goodbye just as Quinn comes out of his room (clearly he didn't go back to sleep - just waited for my shower to end). I ask Him to fix Quinn some orange juice before He leaves (so I can start and finish pumping one boob before Liam wakes up) and am answered with, "I guess so" and a nice big sigh. Yeah, don't let me stop you from getting out of the house in under 40 minutes and having done NOTHING to help with the morning routine. And so He gets Quinn some orange juice, says goodbye, and is on His way to work. Where I imagine him sitting at his desk, checking email, browsing the internet, and waiting for meetings to start. All without children begging, whining, or fighting for his attention. And I start to think to myself, in a very tiny voice, "what the hell is up with you today? Snap out of this bad mood?" And I quickly tell that tiny voice To Go Bite It. And the morning continues. I curse His Laziness as I wipe the counters (why the heck do I even ask him to do dishes at night if he's just going to leave this huge mess on the counter, the stove, ugh), empty the dishwasher (how many times do I have to tell Him you cannot put the bottles in like that - they flip over and fill with water - and do not get clean. damn it). The morning continues and I get Liam up, change him, nurse him, try to entertain an over-tired Quinn, play with the both of them (try to prevent Liam from knocking down Quinn's blocks), feed them breakfast, and wait for my mom to come so I can go to work - and the cursing in my head continues. Must be so nice to just get up, get yourself ready, relax on the couch, and then Leave For Work. Oh great - He didn't clean the tray for the high chair last night, thanks. And we're almost out of oatmeal. And He didn't change the bag in the diaper pail. What the He**? Why do I need to be in charge of remembering everything. (Damn - shut up tiny voice, I know I'm lucky to have someone who does the dishes at night, shut up, I know I'm lucky that he even has a job to leave for, shut up, I know I shouldn't complain - but just shut up.) Oh and the library books are overdue. Of course. (Shut up you stupid tiny voice. All of this is totally justified. I'm going to make a list. A list of everything I do in the morning and a list of everything He does half-assed in the evening. Then we'll see. Yeah, we'll see just how this isn't working and it totally isn't fair. It's just not fair.)
And so later at work I went to use the bathroom and guess what - PMS sucks and looking back on my sour mood this morning is soooo typical of PMS it pisses me off. So, yeah. No lists were made, He probably didn't sigh when I asked Him to get Quinn orange juice, and I am lucky to have someone that helps out as much as He does. I just wish He'd do it right - at least once a month, when it really matters. =)